“Okay, what’s my motivation for sex?”
“You’re a man, dear; anything short of death is motivation for sex.”
Where The Boys Aren’t

Saturday, September 24 2016

Adolescent Spring

Stumbled on a Tumblr, 青臭い春, full of Japanese cheesecake from an earlier era. Easy on the eyes, and some pleasantly natural toplessness as well, to warn those for whom bikinis are worksafe but nipples are not.

This is Yumi Asō, an actress born in 1963 and still working a lot:

Yumi Asō

Aging nicely, too:

Yumi Asō, 2015

(via, promoting a drama that has some other pretty women, and four adorable pre-teens. [Side note: I was curious about the young Ema Baanzu, and wasn’t surprised to discover that Japanese Wikipedia included the details of her 25-21-26 figure; sigh])

Following the trail of Yumi’s bikini work led here, a fairly random assortment of bikini-clad cuties, and this one caught my eye:

Midori kinouchi bikini

But the caption gave her name as “木之内绿”, and the only things that came up in Google were a handful of Chinese blogs and some really obscure video sites that wanted to play three-minute ads. They clearly identified her as a Japanese singer, but even forcing Google to return only Japanese results turned up nothing. Turns out the Chinese fan sites were writing her first name in hanzi instead of hiragana, and fixing that returned a wealth of information about idol singer Midori Kinouchi. These days she’s apparently an anti-nuke activist.

Friday, September 23 2016

The only winning move…

…is not to play:

Lolicon Monopoly

(via)

Monday, September 19 2016

Where The Boys Aren’t

This sign spells out in detail the gender-based restrictions on eating at ConTERRAZZA in Shinjuku, claimed to be Japan’s first women’s restaurant. I suspect they’re not hip to the whole “57 varieties” self-labeling system(s).

Conterrazza: Italian restaurant for women

(via)

Saturday, September 17 2016

The future is in good hands…

(via)

Thursday, September 15 2016

Moa Time and Space

Because of the big power outage that we spent days cleaning up after, I decided I needed more protection at the office. Moa Metal couldn’t be everywhere at once. Until now.

Babytardis

Wednesday, September 14 2016

Lies publishers tell

#1 with a bullet to the back of the head: “ebook sales declining”.

Maybe charging 16% more for the Kindle edition than they do for the hardcover has something to do with it? Note that the paperback edition is no longer in print.

Publishers fucking over customers and authors

I don’t remember what specific book this was. It doesn’t matter, because when the publishers set the price, the Kindle edition is almost always more expensive than the paperback, and pricing it above the hardcover isn’t rare.

And if you look at the reviews, the Kindle editions from major publishers are frequently riddled with errors, and illustrations are often misplaced, mangled, or just plain missing.

Monday, September 12 2016

I loved my cooler…

…so I let it go.

Frozen ice packs

Sunday, September 11 2016

Hillary’s new campaign song

Youtube link, because Sony doesn’t like embedding.

Also, new slogan: “Stand up for Hillary! She can’t do it alone!”.

Friday, September 9 2016

Pokemon Pop Quiz

In the following pictures, you see an elderly gentleman whose angry ranting about the destruction of his dock has suddenly been washed away by the sight of a 12-year-old girl. What is he saying?

  1. You remind me of my granddaughter!
  2. Damn, I’d like to see you all grown up!
Pokemon dirty old man 1
Pokemon dirty old man 2

The correct answer is 2: 「おお〜、8年後が楽しみじゃ」

The cane is a nice touch, don’t you think?

Wednesday, September 7 2016

I don’t know anything about ‘Connie Maheswaran’…

…but goodness, what a pretty cosplayer.

Danielle cosplaying Connie Maheswaran

Geo::OLC Perl module

There are multiple competing algorithms for converting latitude/longitude locations into something easier for humans to work with. Some of them are proprietary, which makes them pretty useless offline or after that company goes out of business.

Google came up with a plausible rationale for inventing their own Open Location Code rather than adopting geohash or something similar. It’s Open Source up on Github, and they supply APIs for several common languages.

But not Perl. Naturally, I had to fix that, so here’s Geo::OLC (compressed tarball). It has a full test suite, a simple command-line tool, and a CGI script that generates a dynamic labeled grid for Google Earth. I think I’ve about got it cleaned up enough to put it on CPAN.

For amusement, the sample location I use in the POD documentation, 8Q6QMG93+742, is Tenka Gyoza in Osaka, which is exactly the sort of place that you’d have trouble finding with standard addressing methods. Actually, you’d have trouble finding it with Google Maps on your phone, as my sister learned.

I tried not to go overboard with Perlisms, but the code still ended up fairly compact, largely because most of the existing APIs were written while the formatting was still in flux, so they’re more generic than necessary.

[Update: turns out someone did write one, but it never made it to CPAN: Geo::OpenLocationCode. Looks like he converted one of the other APIs instead of writing it from scratch, so he inherited the same bug in recover_nearest.]

Tuesday, September 6 2016

These days, “BL” means something different in Japan…

Boy's Life Japan from 1969

(via)

Usa! Usa! Usa!

Once upon a time, there was a third-string idol group called Gal♥Doll. As you might expect from the name, it was a trio of pretty girls uglied up in Gal makeup and fashion. I found a few videos, which I won’t link because they’re terrible, but the only reason I know they exist in the first place is that AV actress Miharu Usa is promoted as a “former idol”. Very little digging (as in “reading to the bottom of the article”) was necessary to discover that Miharu was the “ace” of Gal♥Doll, Ryouka Nishinaga (center).

Gal♥Doll

Honestly, if I’d seen this picture first, I wouldn’t have been interested enough to follow up on her, and the stills from her AV work are typically unappealing. Instead, what caught my eye was this (NSFW):

(Continued on Page 4932)

Sunday, September 4 2016

“There can be only two!”


Ai Shinozaki, Highlander

(via)

Saturday, September 3 2016

Still burning

The Soberanes Fire is still going strong, with 95,716 acres burned, and still only 60% contained. Almost all of the active fire area is deep in heavily forested mountains, and for extra fun, there’s apparently a heck of a lot of poison oak in that area, which is affecting firefighters despite their precautions.

Still no word on catching the clowns whose illegal campfire started it.

Air quality is good in my area; I think everything that’s still burning is on the other side of the mountains now, and the winds are pushing the smoke and ash southeast.

Pic dump

Time to clean out the downloads folder. I’ve lost track of where I found most of these, but any collection of photos that includes Miwako Kakei in a teddy can’t be all bad…

This 7-11 only offers so much convenience:

(Continued on Page 4929)

Thursday, September 1 2016

Wait, what?

Okay, it doesn’t surprise me in the slightest to see former Morning Musume member Asami Konno leading a parade of Pikachus, wearing a sash celebrating the success of the new Pokemon movie. Even if she weren’t an announcer for TV Tokyo, it’s the sort of thing you expect to find former idol singers at.

Asami Konno, with Pikachus

But what are she and her partner Moeko doing with their hands?

Asami Konno, channeling Babymetal

It’s not a one-time thing, either; there are half a dozen shots where they’re doing Babymetal’s signature fox-head gesture with one or both hands. I can only assume that Pikachu fans use it too. Which helps to explain this.

But nothing can explain this.

Then again, “kon-kon” is the sound a fox makes, although this Konkon usually makes more of a “boin” sound…

(Continued on Page 4928)

Wednesday, August 31 2016

Follow the white rabbit…


Now this is an AKB48 outfit I can get behind!

Mio Tomonaga, bunnygirl

(via)

Monday, August 29 2016

You say tomato…

Voice actress and singer Haruka Tomatsu is at her best when she’s being adorkable. Most of her photoshoots recognize this and stick with showing off a pretty girl and a smile, not trying too hard to sex her up.

Haruka Tomatsu, adorkable

Sometimes, though, they insisted on trying for steam, and the best of the bunch end up as “hot shot of someone who looks nothing like her”. The rest include some of the most awkward cheesecake I’ve ever seen. She really looks like she wants to be somewhere else, and the outfits do not flatter her gangly frame.

This one is nice, but she’s almost unrecognizable.

(Continued on Page 4926)

RIP Gene Wilder

Another strike against 2016. Dammit.

“Need a clue, take a clue; got a clue, leave a clue.”